Parenting is hard. It\u2019s a cliched, blanket statement, but it holds a lot of truth, right? Kids are messy, they are loud, and they can drive you up a wall. But regardless of how they make you feel, there are some things you should never say to your child.<\/p>\n
You learn from an early age the power words have over others, so just imagine the power you have when you speak to your child \u2014 the little person that\u2019s relying on you for absolutely everything. When you speak to them negatively, when you tell them they\u2019re being destructive or loud, when you shout at them to leave you alone, you\u2019re telling them one thing \u2014 that they don\u2019t matter. Kids can be influenced very easily. It won\u2019t take many times of you telling them that they are annoying before they start to believe that they are a nuisance their own mother can\u2019t handle. Certain phrases tear your children down instead of building them up and can have serious consequences for their self-esteem and confidence.<\/p>\n
No one\u2019s saying you have to over-praise your child and tell them they are perfect, but you should use positive language, even when scolding, and remember that no matter how short your fuse is, they are children. They can\u2019t take the heat you\u2019re doling out like adults can and, whether you agree or not, you don\u2019t have a right to let your frustrations out on them. We all make mistakes, but take care to not say these 13 things to your child and keep their little hearts and minds on your own.<\/p>\n
1\u2033Stop Crying.\u201d<\/p>\n
If your child is crying, then they are upset. Sure, it\u2019s frustrating that the reason they\u2019re crying is because you gave them the exact snack they asked for, but kids are kids. How many times have you, as an adult, burst into tears over nothing? Telling your children to stop crying is telling them that the way they process their emotions isn\u2019t OK.<\/p>\n
2\u2033Just Let Me Do It.\u201d<\/p>\n
Watching your 3-year-old try to zip his own jacket with mittens on is hard, I know. Especially when they are insistent on doing it on their own. But the phrase \u201cjust let me do it\u201d can be damaging. Instead, ask them if they need help or ask if you can show them a trick to making it easier.<\/p>\n
3\u2033I Don\u2019t Like You Right Now.\u201d<\/p>\n
Kids are going to do some terrible things. They\u2019re going to make giant messes, they\u2019re going to throw tantrums, they\u2019re going to act out when you ask them to do something \u2014 it\u2019s all normal. And sure, there will come a point when you think, \u201cI don\u2019t even like my own kid right now.\u201d But you can\u2019t say that to your little mini-me. Instead, tell them you don\u2019t like the way they are acting or the way they are speaking.<\/p>\n
4\u2033You Have No Reason To Be Upset.\u201d<\/p>\n
How do you know? I once got upset because I lost one of my child\u2019s boots in Target and cried the whole way home. I felt like an idiot, but I had my reason for crying, and so does your child. They have every right to be upset about something and, often, the reason they\u2019re upset may be something normal like they\u2019re exhausted or hungry. (Seriously, if anyone knows the life of a child being hangry, it\u2019s my kid and me.)<\/p>\n
5\u2033Only Babies Act Like That.\u201d<\/p>\n
This phrase covers a whole range of situations. I\u2019ve heard parents say this to older children crying, to big kids having accidents, and even to preschoolers who are over-tired. It\u2019s belittling, end of story.<\/p>\n
6\u2033I Sacrifice A Lot For You.\u201d<\/p>\n
Lots of mommy martyrs like to use this one. Of course you sacrifice a lot; you\u2019re a mother. But your children didn\u2019t ask to be here. They didn\u2019t ask you to have them. Reminding them that you sacrifice a lot for them makes you the queen of guilt trips and can make your children feel like they owe you something for being a mother.<\/p>\n
7\u2033Leave Me Alone.\u201d<\/p>\n
We all need quiet time as parents, but you should say that instead. \u201cMommy needs a little break.\u201d \u201cMommy is going to have some alone time.\u201d<\/p>\n
8\u2033I Never Get Time To Myself.\u201d<\/p>\n
Again, sanctimommy words. There\u2019s literally no reason to say this to your child. You\u2019re going to make them feel bad if they\u2019re old enough to process that statement, or you\u2019re just putting it in their head that they are a nuisance.<\/p>\n
9\u2033Stop Asking Me Questions.\u201d<\/p>\n
It\u2019s annoying, I know. But you want your kids to be curious. You want them to question their surroundings, to ask you about things they hear and see.<\/p>\n
10\u2033Get Over It.\u201d<\/p>\n
You\u2019re basically telling your child that their feelings don\u2019t matter and that they need to hurry up and move past a situation. Unfair.<\/p>\n
11\u2033It\u2019s Not A Big Deal.\u201d<\/p>\n
But everything is a big deal to kids. Literally, everything. If they finish a puzzle, if their ice cream cone falls to the floor, and seeing a giraffe at the zoo \u2014 all enormously big deals.<\/p>\n
12\u2033Don\u2019t Be So ___.\u201d<\/p>\n
Shy. Bratty. Rude. Talkative. Loud. This is your child. They are going to do things and say things and sometimes you\u2019re not going to like it. But telling them not to be something doesn\u2019t help. You can ask them to \u201cbe more grateful\u201d instead of saying, \u201cdon\u2019t be so rude.\u201d It\u2019s all about positive reinforcement.<\/p>\n
13\u2033I Don\u2019t Care.\u201d
\nWhether it\u2019s about their friend at recess that ate a wood chip or that they are now a Buzz fan instead of Woody, it\u2019s important to them. It\u2019s important that they share things with you, that they ask you what you think. They want you to be just as excited as they are, so muttering that you don\u2019t care makes them feel like their thoughts are pointless. If you don\u2019t care, why should anyone else?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Parenting is hard. It\u2019s a cliched, blanket statement, but it holds a lot of truth, right? Kids are messy, they are loud, and they can<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":15959,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15958","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-news"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/storieshub.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15958","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/storieshub.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/storieshub.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/storieshub.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/storieshub.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=15958"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/storieshub.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15958\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":15960,"href":"https:\/\/storieshub.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15958\/revisions\/15960"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/storieshub.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/15959"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/storieshub.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=15958"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/storieshub.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=15958"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/storieshub.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=15958"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}